The X-Project

Kyle helps Cammie install her special plumming and offers suggestions as to what to do with the old one.

The new place was going to be nice if only for the reason that Cammie was going to have her own space. Of course there were other things to set up. Special 'things.' And that she was waiting on as she went through the few boxes she had. "You know, I really need to decorate this place. Maybe a spattered blood motif," she muttered.

Not going up the fire escape was -weird- to Kyle. Usually he just went up and bugged Ramsey, or sometimes Jubilee, and that was that. Going in the front door was just super weird. But Jubilee was at the lobby desk and opened the door for him so he could wheel the dolly and it's stack of boxes in, and they shared a few dumb jokes before the elevator arrived.

Kyle knocked on the door, two quick raps, and then leaned against the wall.

Cammie put a bandanna over her hair and walked to the door, opening it and grinning, "I'm sorry, I think you're a bit too early for our wild sex appointment."

Kyle blinked. "Hey, if that's an offer, I'm single." He hadn't yet announced the breakup or anything, because he and Jan were still in the super awkward phase and that was just weird and it felt like a dick thing to do, but hey, Cammie was -hot-. "In the meantime, hey, I got your plumbing and stuff, and a big box of spare filters." The stand-alone toilet and compactor were pretty easy to setup. "And a couple of cards for the contractors we use at the mansion in case your new bosses want you to get anything else setup like, I dunno, a filter for your shower or something."

"Well, I'm always up for wild sex," Cammie said stepping aside to let him in, "So, what happened? Finally get tired of her jumping up to defend you for no reason on message board arguments? Because that was pretty creepy." She rubbed her hands together after a moment, "Let's get this crap set up, huh? Ha. I kill myself."

Kyle nodded, and steered the dolly into the apartment. "More awkward. Jan is... was... like in love with me and I'm totally not in love with her and we had a fight about her wanting me to move in with her and it was just, you know, awkward." He leaned it against a wall and dragged the top box down and then pointed a thumb at the larger box. "Here, help me with this thing, it's pretty awkward to move around."

"Sure thing," Cammie said, moving to help with said box, "So, this box is totally like your relationship then," she joked. Relationships WERE a joke as far as she was concerned, "If I get to be too much of a bitch about it feel free to tell me to STFU, other than that, I can so take you out tonight for booze and sex."

- Hide quoted text - "Nah, it's all good. I gotta joke about this with somebody or I'll like, I dunno, what do people do when they're stupid about relationships?" Kyle wasn't super upset about it, but he was bummed out, in a general sort of sense. "And dude, I don't get drunk remember. I did have this awesome conversation with Wanda about scotch though. She has a stash in her desk." And he'd learned he didn't like the stuff, despite Wanda's assurance that it was the good kind.

They carried the box into the bathroom, still startlingly clean of wet towels or dirty laundry or toiletries in general, and Kyle sliced the tape open with a claw. "Okay, so d'jyou wanna leave the regular toilet in here in case you boink Ramsey and he's gotta take a leak, or you want me to take it out and you can just have yours?"

"I know you don't, but it's fucking fun to try to get you blasted," Cammie said, "And nah, I think I may have to move on. He's gone all emo-retarded. I blame the French bitch," her tone was completely nonchalant. All it had been, after all, was a good time. Once things got complicated, she wasn't going to stick around.

"On the upside, I still have my stomping boots and a vast knowledge of Underground clubs and no need for two toilets. Go me."

"His ex? She's hot, but creepy." Kyle said. "Okay, so we yank the other one. Not like yours can't handle regular shit." He pulled the wrench out from where it hung from a beltloop and crouched to turn the water off. Removing a toilet was easy, remove the bolt covers, loosen the bolts and just pull the whole thing up. But first, the water had to come out of the tank, and that took several flushes. "Hey, as long as you're not trying to feed me one of those drano and gasoline margaritas or something, I am totes game for a club and some vodka or something."

"I save the truly toxic stuff for me and me alone. I'll even be nice and not use it for body shots. I hear tell that burns like a bitch," Cammie said, "We'll make it a night to celebrate your freedom. It'll be fun. At least, more fun than what you're doing now."

Kyle feigned a huge grin. "Aw, but Cammie, setting up your magic shitcan so you can be a superspy is my favorite thing -ever-." He stood and hefted the original-version toilet out of the way. "You should do something funny with this, like, I dunno, plant flowers in it or something." He suggested, as he muscled the new toilet into place. "kay, so, this one's fixed up so anything that gets flushed gets filtered, but since it's gonna be on city water, you'll probably wanna change your filter when the light goes yellow and not red now, or something. Pretty sure your boss'd kill everyone if you poisoned the world with your poison craps."

"I'm sure I can find a use for a toilet in the living room," Cammie said, "Got'cha, change filters more often, because I'm 'special'," she said using finger quotes, "And hey, he can't kill people if they're all already dead. Ha."

"Yeah, but dude, your bosses scare the pants off me." Kyle protested. He -liked- Pete the few times he'd talked to the man but Remy just scared the shit out of him. Something about the way the guy moved. "Hey, if you want I can totally get you some potting soil and you can grow some, I dunno, nightshade or something. Hemlock. I don't even know. "

"I like the way you think. At least about the planter bit," Cammie said, considering it. IT was actually a good idea. She could, literally, keep any amount of toxic foliage she wanted around here. That had merit. Like a greenhouse, but with DOOM.

"Cool. Where do you want the thing? Right in the middle of your living room?" Kyle bent and lifted the old toilet - they were surprisingly light. "Might be worth getting some sunlamps or something too. Miss Munroe could probably tell you how to grow a bunch of stuff, she's over here now too, right?" At least, that's what he thought. He wasn't entirely sure anymore.

"Right in the middle of the living room is fine," Cammie said, "I'll take it from there. And I don't even know, I suppose I'll find out. Barring that, I'm decent enough with plants. They don't tend to die from breathing in fumes and I know enough to give them water instead of gasoline unless I'm planning on starting a fire."

Right. Starting fires was probably part of her job now. Kyle put the toilet in the living room, close to one of the windows and next to a sofa. "We'll need to block the pipes so you don't get mud on your floor before you turn it into a planter. But you can do that with a pipe plug, they sell 'em at the Home Depot." He dusted his hands off on his jeans and grinned. "Easysauce, one new can so you don't poison New York, one old toilet turned into a classy tasteful house decoration, you're good to go."

"I love my life," Cammie said wistfully, "Now, if only I could get drunk, it'd be perfect."

"Can't help you there. I only hit tipsy trying to talk like Marius on my birthday and that was after a whole lot of beer." Kyle explained. "I like, literally do not have enough money to buy the amount of alcohol I need to overcome the healing factor." Okay, technically only because he was between paychecks and had to get tires for the bike. "On the other hand, hey, no hangovers, right?"

"Yeah, from what I've seen they really suck. So, let's blow this joint and go pointlessly drink stuff," Cammie said, clapping her hands together, "It'll be FUN."

"As long as you don't try to get me to drink one of those gasoline margaritas." Kyle agreed. "Seriously, those stink."

----

Amanda stops by with a house warming gift.

Their new recruit had been moved in a little while, and having found herself as the person doing the whole room finding thing, Amanda decided she might as well go the whole hog and check up on her after the fact. Team building and all that. Or, failing that, an exchange of snarky words.

Carrying a bottle of motor oil with a cheap stick-on bow stuck to it, she knocked on the door of the apartment that had been Illyana's and was now Cammie's. "Room service!"

Cammie was working on a paper, not one of hers, but she still did need to get it done by the deadline if she wanted the person she was writing for to cough up the cash for it. She snapped the computer closed.

"How does one service a room?" Cammie quipped when she opened the door. Right now the room's defining feature was the toilet Kyle had replaced sitting by her desk being used as a planter. For something that looked suspiciously like hemlock. And it was missing leaves.

"Well, I'm not planning to make your bed or anything. But I thought I'd drop by and see how you were settling in, make sure things were okay." Amanda's background in witchcraft meant she recognised the plant instantly, and her eyebrow went up at the chewed-on state. "Just when I think I have my head around this whole 'eats poison' thing, there's something else. How's hemlock taste?"

Cammie shrugged, "Better than foxglove and worse than poison oak?" she said, "And I must be doing something right if I can use a toilet as a planter."

"We've got everything from complete artistic decoration with Sofia to Jubilee's hobo furniture look," Amanda replied with a grin. "You're not really as out there as you'd think, especially with Sarah using her bones on the dartboard when she's bored." She held out the motor oil. "Housewarming gift. Welcome to the Trenchcoats."

"Yoink," Cammie said, taking it, "Thanks. Ooo, good brand too," she said, cracking it open, sticking a finger in and then putting that in her mouth. It was sweet. "So, everyone here is crazy? That's a comfort."

"Completely and utterly," Amanda replied easily, helping herself to a seat. "The thing is, tho'? We're actually pretty sane in how we manage ourselves. Not much of the bottling up and lashing out you get at the mansion - we drink hard, we play hard and then we show up at work the next day and get the job done." She grinned. "And we don't tend to try and one-up each other on crappy lives - Remy tends to win that one hands down."

"Meh, I don't bother anyone with my crappy life anyway," that was her own damn business. A few people knew, and they were the only ones that mattered. Having friends, and adopted family like that was still such a new thing. "So, you don't have to worry about me trying to out emo anyone," she said with a smirk.

"Just as well, since that doesn't tend to go well. 'Sides, who has the time, in between surveillance and background checks?"

"Oh, people always find the time to whine about how much their life sucks," Cammie said, "That's what the internet is for. That and porn."

"There's always times for porn." Amanda snickered. "You know, you could really make a feature of this toilet garden thing. Fill up the tank with a few other delicacies - oleander, maybe, perhaps some digitalis and some deadly nightshade. A real Better Homes and Gardens thing with a twist."

"I may actually give that a try. We'll see if the first plant survives more than a week first," Cammie said. Things did have a tendency to die around her despite the best of intentions.

"You and the plant both," Amanda replied with a wry grin. "I s'pose Remy gave you the whole 'it's a shitty job and you'll die young' talk?"

"Duh," Cammie said, "'Course, I wasn't planning on a long, fruitful life in the first place. Might as well have some fun before I kick it."

"Live hard, die young, don't let the bastards get you down, eh?" Amanda tilted her head. "So, has anyone introduced you to Finnegans yet? Since 's not a proper welcome without liquid refreshment. First round's on me, even."

"Pretty much. And no, not yet. I do have to warn you though, if you're out to get me plastered, you're in for one big fucking disappointment," Cammie said with a grin. "But I do like the pleasant burning of really strong liquor."

"I drink with Sarah on a regular basis - believe me, I know better." Amanda snorted. "Grab your coat and I'll see who else we can drum up." She paused, and grinned. "Welcome to the Trenchcoats. We know the value of booze."